Ripping Off the Band Aid

     While I know with every bone in my body that the decision to start the next chapter of my life in Italy is right for me, it is not to say that it was not hard leaving the people that I love.  While I am for the first time in a very long time excited about the future, rather than being afraid and plagued with worry, I still shed many tears saying good-bye to the people that I am so blessed to have love me.  

     As I wept in the arms of my son he comforted me telling me to go live out my dreams and find happiness.  I could not help but be struck by the role reversal of him pushing me out of the nest.  When being a good mother has been such a significant part of my life for so many years it is hard to imagine waking up with my focus solely being on what will make me happy in the day, but that day has come.  

     What I was dreading most was having my best friend of over 25 years drive me to the airport.  The last time I was in Italy was two years ago with her to celebrate our 25th anniversary of being friends.  We shared so many amazing moments together on our "great grape adventure" through Tuscany.  While some may have found it odd that we were celebrating the anniversary of our friendship like many would a wedding anniversary, for us it did not seem odd at all.  Why don't we celebrate the anniversary of our wonderful friendships?  After all, often the marriages end while our friendships remain everlasting.

  

     While so many people go through life in search of their soul mate I do not have that need as I have found that in Elizabeth.  The very definition of a soul mate is a person that you share a deep and natural affinity, love, intimacy and compatibility with - our twin soul.  While such a term is usually reserved for a lover or a spouse, why can't it be the one that has walked through life with you?  No one knows me and loves me like Elizabeth.

     When we first met we were young and naive women entering into university.  Since then we have shared both great happiness and tears together.  We have in many ways grown up together in every way that counts.  We stood beside each other through our relationships with men, through marriages, through the birth of our children and through our divorces.  While we may not have always agreed with each other's life choices what has made our friendship everlasting is that no matter what we have supported each other without judgement.  Our motto: Eyes wide open.  Just as it should be with a soul mate, we know what each other is feeling without the need for words, and often we know what the other is thinking before we have even finished our thought.  I don't know if our special bond is grounded in that we happen to share the same first name, or if it is that Elizabeth's birthday is the same as my grandmother's.  Both women have truly unconditionally loved me, as I have loved them, and both are women of understated strength. 

     On the drive to the airport Elizabeth and I tried as long as possible to deny the impending reality of me getting on a plane.  During the weeks leading up to me leaving Elizabeth often uttered, "I can't believe that you are leaving me", but just as often she said that she knew that this was something that I needed to do for me.  Again, her unwavering support.  I decided that it was best that when we got to the airport that the good-bye be fast like ripping off a band aid - deeply painful for a few moments, but better that then lingering pain.  So just outside the airport entrance we sobbed in each other's arms, even though we knew in our hearts that this was not really good-bye as with a friendship like ours their is never really a good-bye; it is everlasting.  

        As my plane approached Italy and I looked out the window to see the beautiful coastline a sense of peace came over me.  It just felt so right.  I have not left behind those whom I love and who love me.  I know with certainty that they will always be in my life.  I smile when I think about how they have already with excitement made plans to come and see me and share in my new life.